It’s well known that divorces can be difficult. Besides dealing with property division, alimony, child support, and visitation, the spouses must also cope with the array of emotions accompanying the end of their marriage. Those emotions can worsen already-existing conflicts and make the divorce process more difficult.
As a sociologist recently explained, no marriage is conflict-free, and those conflicts may fall into one of four categories. First are “one-time, solvable problems,” which are conflicts created by a particular situation, not a clash of personalities. Second are “cyclical conflicts,” which are ongoing, but alternate between being a big problem at some times, a small problem at others.
Third are “deal-breakers” – the sort of conflicts that cannot be solved by agreement, because they arise from a fundamental difference in personality or belief. Lastly, there are “wounding problems.” These conflicts arise over and over – like cyclical problems – but they tend to produce feelings of hurt and frustration, and can be very difficult to resolve.
Most Common Relationship Conflicts
- Communication Issues:
- Poor Communication: Difficulty expressing thoughts and feelings, not listening actively, and misinterpreting each other.
- Unmet Expectations: Unclear or unmet expectations about roles, responsibilities, and communication styles.
- Trust Issues:
- Betrayal: Infidelity, dishonesty, or broken promises can erode trust.
- Lack of Transparency: Secrets and lack of openness can create feelings of suspicion and insecurity.
- Financial Disagreements:
- Spending Habits: Differing views on budgeting, saving, and spending can lead to conflict.
- Financial Goals: Disagreements about financial priorities, such as buying a house, saving for retirement, or paying off debt.
- Intimacy Issues:
- Lack of Physical Intimacy: Decreased sexual desire, communication problems about intimacy, or unmet sexual needs.
- Emotional Distance: Feeling disconnected, emotionally unavailable, or lacking emotional intimacy.
- Power Struggles:
- Control Issues: One partner may feel overly controlling or the other may feel dominated.
- Unresolved Conflicts: Past unresolved conflicts can fester and create ongoing tension.
- Differing Values and Goals:
- Life Goals: Disagreements about career paths, family planning, or lifestyle choices.
- Personal Values: Differing values and beliefs can lead to clashes on important issues.
- Household Chores and Responsibilities:
- Unequal Distribution: Unfair division of household chores and childcare responsibilities can create resentment.
- External Stressors:
- Work Stress: Job demands, long hours, and work-related stress can spill over into the relationship.
- Family Issues: Conflicts with in-laws or other family members can strain the relationship.
Unfortunately, conflicts do not evaporate once a couple decides to end their marriage.
Instead, they often contribute to making a divorce contentious. For this reason, if you are getting divorced, it’s helpful to have an attorney who can buffer conflict for you and help reduce the amount of stress and difficulty you experience during the divorce process.
The divorce attorneys at Minella Law Group are skilled at using use their negotiation and advocacy skills to help resolve all types of property, child custody, and support conflicts. We are also experienced in using collaborative law or mediation to resolve divorce conflicts when appropriate. You don’t have to go through a divorce on your own.
Please call (619) 289-7948 to set up an appointment with the experienced family law attorneys at Minella Law Group.
